Past the Limit...

Have you ever been pushed so far to your limit that you feel like your insides could just explode? I'm having one of those moments right now! It's 4 am and I have not yet gotten to sleep for the night. Little Angel woke up at 11:30 - no known reason we can find - and will not go back to sleep no matter what we do. She is currently gated in her bedroom, and aside from having to occasionally go & remind her to leave my bedroom door alone (it's closed so hubby ho drives a truck all day can attempt at least an hour of sleep!), she is playing like it's noon! I thought I finally had a handle on this whole parenting thing, especially where little piglets sleep is concerned, and then this.
Needless to say, it has not been a shining star night for me by way of mothering or Godly attitude. While I'd like to blame it on hormones, we've had these nights before. Thankfully they are few and far between, though! I will admit that without sleep, I am a monster. I require lots of sleep, and especially right now, I could sleep all day and night.
I know God does not give us more than we can handle, but now that my throat is raw from yelling, my eyes are puffy from crying, and out wonderful upstairs neighbors (thankfully they seem to never sleep!) probably think I am a tyrant, I begin to think maybe God didn't pick the right person for this job! Don't get me wrong, I would not trade my piglet for the world, but in moments like this, I wish I could just check out from reality.
I think the most difficult part of this is that hubby is just as bad as me without sleep, and we end up arguing with each other. This solves nothing, and then I feel completely helpless because the one I am supposed to band together with on issues like this is the one I end up being angry with.
Tonight has been a bit different from any other time this has happened though. Tonight I was able to stop (I know, it took a long while for me to realize I needed to do this, but I got it eventually!) and pray. I will admit it was probably one of the most desperate prayers I have made, and I do not feel much peace right now (I am attributing that to lack of sleep), but I do feel a bit of comfort knowing that God will help me though this time.
So, I have been completely humbled once again.